Brooms and Wings
by kikibrown
Summary: Max and the Flock somehow get into Hogwarts as Harry obnoxiously tries to get Max. This is my first story, tell me if its good or not...
1. Chapter 1

Kiki: Ah, everyone has one of these at the top of their fan fictions.

Lilith: Yes, they say something about that they don't own any of these characters, like in this particular case, the character making is due to Madam J.K. Rowling and Monsieur James Patterson. And that we don't own anything in this story, besides the plot, of course. By the way, you want to say it?

Kiki: But you just said it…

Lilith: Really? Oh right. Can I make a statement to free me from your clutches?

Kiki: Sure, but in complete sentences without using the letter "A".

Lilith: What?!?!?!

Kiki: Come on…you can do it!

Lilith: okay… "I beg of you f. fiction lovers to, um, ring the police to help me, um, run from this extreme person who took me from my home. I would welcome it if you did this for me. The, um, position I'm in is…." Dang, you address has at least seven A's in it!

Kiki: I'm craftier than you think.

Lilith: Kiki! The fan fiction!

Kiki: Right!

* * *

Everything was calm and normal at Hogwarts that April afternoon. The sun was shining, the grass was green, and the Whomping Willow was attempting to slam students as they ran nervously across its section of the Hogwart's grounds. Meanwhile, at the Quidditch field, Harry was busy tying Ron to his Firebolt.

"Are you sure this will work, Harry?" Ron put in an effort to sound positive, but there was a slightly tense note in his voice.

"Don't be silly, Ron. Of course it will!" Harry smile was rather sinister, "This is a sure way to get rid of your recent fear of heights. I'll tie you to the broom; you rise, freak out for a while, and realize that heights are nothing to be afraid of. You can't fall, because you're tied to the broom, and if you want to go down, just yell and I'll come up with your broom! Understood?"

Ron gulped, but said nothing. He remembered some of Harry's _other_ brilliant plans; ding-dong-ditching Hagrid, putting a dung bomb in Dumbledore's boxers, giving Ron a polyjuice potion to turn into Malfoy and make out with Snape. The last one was Ron's personal favorite, although he kept this a secret that was locked deep in the bottom of his heart, and never told _anyone_.

"Okay, the knot is tied. Have fun!" Harry let go of his broom and it whizzed up so fast that Ron was a trembling blur.

Ron closed his eyes as he felt himself flying, but curiosity got the better of him and he looked down at Harry, who looked like an ant right now. _The grounds are so fascinating_, thought Ron, _from 100 meters high._

That's when Ron panicked, yelling loudly, "100 METERS HIGH?!?!?!"

"HARRY!!! COME UP HERE AND BRING ME DOWN!!!!" Ron screamed at the top of his lungs.

"What is it, Ron? I can't hear you!!!" Harry suppressed his evil cackling for later, and attempted to put a confused expression on his face.

As a matter of fact, Harry heard Ron quite well; many other students were curiously watching the screaming, crying, red shape whiz and swoop upward and downward across the school grounds.

"Mr. Potter! What in Merlin's beard are you doing to Mr. Weasley?" Professor McGonagall, who just came to the scene, was not exactly in the mood for pranks at that particular moment.

Harry gazed innocently into McGonagall's red face, "Oh, lovely day, isn't it, Professor? The sun is shining, the grass is green, the Whomping-,"

"Stop quoting from the fan fiction! Now, explain immediately!"

"Uh, well-,"

"Harry, I'm…going to…puke…" Ron yelled weakly from the sky.

Now, it turns out that Ron Weasley was flying by where Professor McGonagall and Harry were standing, and when he was right overhead, his stomach release its contents.

"_Protego_!" cried Harry, who had fast reflexes, and all the barf that was supposed to land on Harry bounced off and landed on McGonagall, who received her own share of Ron's partially digested lunch as well.

"Holy %$#, Ron, you mother-*$%#%$# little &^%$*#!!!" The female professor was being so profane that Harry's mouth hung wide open, as well as the other students. Colin Creevy, who updated his camera to a video camera, was recording the McGonagall's unexpected outcry.

"I can't %*$$ believe you DARE upturn you stomach upon my &%$^&^% NEW ROBES!!!!! You know how EXPENSIVE robes are these days? Go &^*# you're %*&^#$ &$%#^&!!!"

Harry was thinking of an escape plan when there was an explosion overhead. A bam, a crack, a scream. Everyone slowly turned their heads toward the sky as one…

"Okay everyone, here's the plan!" Max announced, pleased about flying in the warm spring air.

"Oh no, another plan," Total groaned from the arms of Fang, "I hate your plans."

Fang looked at Max, "Just tell us were we're going,"

"We are currently passing over England, over some countryside, I think. There's this huge abandoned castle over there," Max reported stiffly, suppressing all temptation of ripping off Total's head.

"You think we can blow it up? Nobody will mind," Iggy lit up and turned his head toward Gazzy, who grinned.

"No!" Max objected, "No blow-,"

They were gone.

"Oh crap, let's go get them," Max nodded her head toward the haunted castle.

Once again, Fang was being useless, taciturn, and so incredibly hot. Max hated him so much when he was like this. She just wanted to grab his shirt and-

"Max, it's a castle, right? Like, a _real_ castle?" Nudge dived down and asked from between Max and Fang as they leaned down toward the colossal building, "I've always wanted to be in a castle! Like a real princess! Wouldn't it be nice to be one? I would rule an _entire_ kingdom! Every morning, I would get a _billion_ sausages for breakfast and for lunch, a HUGE sandwich, and _a huge sone_ and dinner will be so big that I would be _stuffed_! And then-,"

"Nudge? I hate to be blunt, but there's something I must tell you,"

"What?"

"SHUT UP!!!!"

"You think my talking is a big problem?" Nudge was rather hurt, thought, _I will not mention what you and Fang were doing last night!_

Angel, who was listening to Nudge's thoughts, raised her eyebrows and stared at Nudge. She whispered, "Really?"

Nudge nodded.

"They did _all_ of that while we were asleep?" Angel looked at Max and Fang unbelievingly.

"Yeah, even the last part. I didn't think a contortionist could do that, but I guess the messed up genes make us more flexible," Nudge experimentally tried to grab her ankles from behind and succeeded in doing so as she dropped 30 feet.

Nudge chucked darkly to herself, fingering the video camera in her pocket, _As soon as I can get onto Fang's laptop, I'll be selling what's on my video camera for so much money, then I'll buy this old castle, fix it, then have Edward Cullen come here every day…yes, soon my plan will work! All I need is money…I need money…I will be so powerful! I will be unstoppable! _

"Mwah ha ha!! I will rule the world!" Nudge didn't relies this was out loud until she noticed Max was staring at her.

"Nudge! Are you talking to yourself again?" Max knew that when Nudge was acting creepy, it was a very grave matter. The last time… Max shuddered, she didn't want to think about it.

"Um, uh, look, there they are!" Nudge, trying to distract Max, pointed to Iggy and Gazzy, who were flying in a tight circle.

"Hey! You guys!" Max waved to them, but when they looked up, they looked alarmed and scared.

They were looking behind Max, pointed, and yelled. Max turned her head to see what they were making a huge fuss about.

Then they collided.

Ron was terrified a minute ago, and then he must have died; he was seeing angels. One blonde teenaged girl, two teen guys, one with jet black hair holding a dog and one with luscious reddish- blonde hair, with a little dirty blonde kid who could be in 2nd grade, and a dark ten year old girl playing tag with an adorable blonde kindergartener whose curls bounced when she laughed. All of them had wings, magnificent wings.

That was before he crashed into them.

Then he thought he was seeing things, because you can't crash into an angel, right?

All six of them fell. Amazingly, he managed to crash into _all_ six of the flying ones, so seven mostly humans, a dog, and a broom fell from the sky into Hogwarts.

And as amazingly as Ron hit all six of them, all of their wings were injured on some way or another, so they couldn't fly. Also, when they saw the large crowd looking at them, they had the sense to tuck in their wings, since they couldn't use them anyway.

Ron heard Professor McGonagall yell a spell out, but he was too tired to hear it. They didn't hit the ground, but slowly floated onto stretchers.

"Take the Muggles to the hospital wing. We'll fix them up and send them to St. Mungo's," the professor said.

"What the hell is St. Mango's?!?" Total yelled from the depths of Fang's jacket, "And what the hell is a Muggle?!?"

"What's going on?" Nudge sat up, winced, and decided to lie back down.

"Is St. Mungo's another version of the School?!? You're not taking us back!" Iggy's arms and one of his legs were broken, but he still attempted to run. Professor Flitwick, who also came to the scene, yelled, _Petrificus Totalus! _Iggy stiffened and fell on the ground, experiencing for the first time in his life a full-body bind.

"Hey! What did you do to Iggy? Let me GO!" Max jumped up and ran. Professor Flitwick raised his wand and yelled, "_Stupefy!"_ Then Max fell to the grass, all was going black…

* * *

Kiki: Haha! I'm just getting started! Sorry it took so long, my stupid computer blocks it...I feel so confined...

Lilith: YOU feel confined?!?!?!?!?

Kiki: Well, see ya! Find out what happens next in the next chapter, which will be uploaded in few minutes!!!


	2. Chapter 2

Ron was still in a daze when Harry decided to check on him.

"Did you see, Harry? They were angels, Harry, angels! I saw their wings!" Ron was staggering back and forth, and clung to Harry's robes to emphasis his point, "Angels!"

"Ron! Don't you _dare_! Remember when you did it to Malfoy? He could never take a shower without crying since," Harry grabbed his robes by the collar and dragged him behind the teachers who were taking the Muggles inside.

He saw one of them, a blonde girl, which was the one who was stunned by Flitwick. She was unconscious on the stretcher, but she was so hot. Harry decided this trip to the hospital wing was worth it.

"First, we need to stop in the Herbology classroom, and then we go, okay?" Harry let go of Ron and snuck into the Herbology room, which wasn't that far from the Quidditch field, anyway. As Harry and Ron skimmed pasts the There were so many flowers, which ones to pick?

It turned out that Ron had picked out a couple flowers; somehow, he found red roses, pink roses, and white roses that Harry didn't find and had arranged them so beautifully with some ferns and baby breath that Harry knew better than to let Ron keep it. Besides, Ron's best talent was flower arrangements, and even though the roses were done in the entire Herbology classroom, he could probably find something else suitable.

"Who are _those_ for?" Harry asked with a snicker.

Ron turned bright red, but he said, "None of your business!"

"Give them to me!" Harry demanded.

"No!" Ron tried to say fiercely, but backing away didn't help.

"Fine," Harry shrugged, "I guess our dear Potions teacher will find out about your little, um, affection for him, ever since you snogged him that winter evening-"

"Please don't tell him, Harry! Don't tell anyone! It was just- wait a second, I never told anyone! How did you know?"

Harry ran his hand through his hair, "Your true love taught me a little something called Occlumency, Ron, and it has been quite useful for many things."

Ron brokenheartedly gave his intricate bouquet to Harry's eager hands.

"Why Ron, you worked so hard on it! Are you sure you are willing to give me such a beautiful bunch of flowers to me?" Harry's falsetto told Ron that he wasn't meaning it, but just wanted to rub it in.

"Yes, Harry. You can have it," Ron droned, looking at his feet.

"Good, now let us go to the hospital wing," Harry strutted toward the castle with Ron dismally following suit.

When they reached the hospital wing, the first thing that they saw was Hermione cutting herself in a corner again. Dumbledore, who wanted to make sure she didn't kill herself if she got too carried away, made sure that every time she wanted to "take a break," she was to go to her specific corner of the hospital wing. Harry and Ron were quite used to this; it was Hermione's little way of getting rid of her hourly stress from being in too many classes.

"Blood…is…good...," Hermione muttered.

"Hermione, did a teacher not call on you when you raised you hand?" asked Harry. _She might be a girl_, thought Harry, _but her emotional breakdowns are awfully worrisome_.

"Professor Vector doesn't understand! I know Arithmancy like the back of my hand! But no, 'We need to let other students take a chance in answering the questions!' No one, besides me and a kid who never even raises his hand, only we two knew the answer! Guess who she chose? The other guy! I am LIVID! This world is extremely unfair! I just want to die!" Hermione wailed and resumed to her skin mutilation.

"Too bad Hogwarts doesn't have a school counselor…" Ron sighed, "Hermione, where did the Muggles that fell out of the sky go?"

Hermione sniffed, "Over there," She pointed to the end of the room, "But it's not like you guys care about me, right? So I'm going to pretend you're talking to me. How am I feeling? Horrible! How was my day? Terrible! Am I sane? No!"

Ron and Harry shook their heads. Filch wouldn't let Hermione take her depression or schizophrenia medication into the school, and boy does he regret it; he rather have dangerous medicine in the school than have a dangerous girl constantly messing the floors up with tears, blood, and ink bottle that were hurled across the room. The two guys walked towards the end of the room.

And there they were; all of them lying peacefully in their beds, with the exception of a talking dog, who was complaining about the room colors and how beige would match better to the lighting than ecru.

"You see? The love of my life is right there!" Ron pointed to the beds and strode up to the reddish-blonde guy's bed, snatched the roses from Harry's hand, placed them on the guy's bed, and stood there with a dreamy look in his eyes.

Iggy suddenly woke up and noticed the roses that were on his bed. "Hey," he looked at Ron and held up the roses, "What chick put these on my bed?"

Ron reddened and said, "Um, uh, well, it wasn't a-."

"Um, this is a school, right? It seems like a boarding school of some sort," Iggy looked around, curiously taking in his surroundings, hoping to be able to see against the white.

"Yes, it is. Well, um, er, do you want to go on a walk with me? Like a tour?" Ron hoped he might be able to get close to this guy, because, to Ron, he was even hotter than Snape was.

"Sure, why not. Hey, what school is this?" Iggy was blinking rapidly.

"Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry," Ron grabbed his hand and pulled him up off his bed.

"Uh huh," Iggy snorted, "And I'm a penguin."

Ron was rather hurt by this, but he replied, "No, I'm serious! Harry? Show him that magic is real!"

Harry, who was standing there and watching, grinned maliciously and cried, "_Levicorpus_!"

Ron rose by his ankle mid air and dangled there, revealing his Victoria's Secret white and pink thong. Meanwhile, Iggy was staring at Ron, not because of the magic done in front of him, but because the thong was white, as well as Ron's butt, so he could pretty much see it.

"Dang, that girl got some booty!" Iggy pointed at Ron's exposed derrière.

Ron was extremely flattered by the compliment given to his rear end, but Harry ruined it by saying, "That's Ron's butt. What are you, blind?"

"Actually," Iggy answered, "I uh, have a medical condition where I can only see the color white."

"That's interesting," Harry, who didn't exactly feel like doing the counter curse for Ron's position, strode up to Max's bed.

"Hey, it's Harry Potter. Why don't you wake up and see why all the girls are crazy for him?" Harry, not seeing instant results, became slightly annoyed.

"Hello? Are you awake?" He tried again prodding her a little. The girl still was asleep.

"WAKE UP!" Harry yelled.

Max, being the paranoid bird girl she was, jumped, grabbed Harry, pinned him to the ground, grabbed his wand, angled it under his chin, and growled, "Who are you and what have you done to my Flock?"

"You don't know who I am?" Harry was confused, because he was slammed down on the ground by a girl who was unconscious a couple minutes ago and also because everyone, including most Muggles, knew who he was.

"No," Max answered angrily. _What a conceited guy,_ she thought.

"You haven't heard of me? The _glasses_? The _black hair_? The _scar_?"

"No."

"Positive?"

"Yes."

"I paid Joy so much for publishing my story! Do you know Joy Rowling?"

"You mean J. K. Rowling?"

"Yes!" Harry felt triumphant, "Where did you hear about her?"

"At the beginning of the fan fiction, Lilith mentioned her."

"Really?" Harry looked at the beginning of the fan fiction, "She did. Oh well, I suppose I should tell you. My name is Harry Potter,"

Max's face lit with recognition, "The scrawny kid who was bullied by his cousin until Hagrid kidnapped you?"

Harry, who becomes irritated by the mentioning of Dudley, ignored that comment, "Yes, I'm Harry Potter, the most popular kid in Hogwarts-"

"Is this some sick experiment that the School is doing on us? Seeing how we react in a fantasy environment?" Max, who was still pinning Harry to the ground, got up and let him go, although his wand was still in Max's hand.

"No! This is an actual place! Magic is real! I swear! Look at Ron over there!" Harry pointed at his poor friend, who was still dangling by his left ankle and his bottom was still naked.

Max blinked a couple times, trying hard to avoid staring at Ron's lingerie. "Its strings or something," she scoffed, "I'm not stupid."

"Why don't you check?" Nudge woke up from a dream filled with shoes, clothes, and Edward Cullen to seeing a guy in a thong. No wonder she screamed for at least a minute.

"You know, I am scarred for life. I think I can never sleep again. You will find me roaming the halls, muttering to myself. I will, like, be an insomniac now, spending my nights wishing for Edward to come and take me away to the Cullen Mansion and bite me. Is Edward even real? I hope so. By the way, who's that girl cutting herself over there?" Nudge, who decided that avoiding Ron might help her keep her eyesight undamaged, stared at Hermione.

"That's Hermione, the smartest and most messed up girl in our school," Ron suddenly thought of a simple idea, "Oy, Hermione! Can you help me down?"

Hermione muttered, "_Liberacorpus_!" and Ron floated down into his proper place on the ground.

Suddenly, Malfoy walks in with Crabbe and Goyle by his sides, acting like the king of the school.

"So, Potter? Being friendly with Mud-Bloods, are you?" Malfoy sneered.

"I advice you to leave, Malfoy, before I do something you will regret for the rest of your life," Harry detested Malfoy because he always tried to take the spot as hottest guy in school from him.

"And what is that, Potter? Have the stupid dog tackle me?"

"Ron," Harry grinned maliciously, "Would you like to show Mr. Malfoy your little talent? I believe you've shown him before, but maybe he forgot how it _feels_ like…"

Ron understood what to do.

"Come here, little Draco…" Ron purred and beckoned with his index finger as he batted his eyelashes, "Want to have some _fun_?"

When Malfoy realized what Ron was about to do, he shrieked, curled up into a ball, and started sobbing. "No…please don't do that …again…I learned my lesson…just…not…again…"

Harry tapped Malfoy on the shoulder. Malfoy, thinking it was Ron, shrieked and passed out, white faced and tear-streaked.

Crabbe and Goyle, who were confused by the way their boss was restrained, decided to go steal food from the house elves, which ridded the Flock, Harry, Ron and Hermione from the idiot Slytherins.

"Excellent work, Ron," Harry praised his best friend, "Remember last time? He hid in a closet for a week. Wonder where he'll be hiding this time?"

"I don't know what you did to him, and I don't want to know, but it must have been pretty bad," Max suppressed her laughter.

"So, I told you who I am, now it would be nice to know who you are," Harry went back to getting a new girlfriend.

"I'm Maximum Ride, but call me Max. That's Iggy, Fang, Nudge, Gasman, Angel, and the dog is Total," Max gestured everyone in the Flock with their names. Fang, Gazzy, and Angel were still asleep, so Nudge was getting bored.

"Hey, is Cedric still around? He's the same guy as Edward anyway, so I'll still be satisfied," Nudge asked hopefully.

"Sorry, he's dead."

Nudge widened her eyes, "What happened?"

"Voldemort killed him."

Hermione and Ron gasped.

"What's wrong with the name Voldemort?" Gazzy suddenly awoke and asked asked.

Hermione and Ron gasped again.

"Most people don't say it. They usually say You-Know-Who or the Dark Lord. The worst one is He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named. It's too long, in my opinion," Harry explained.

Gazzy chucked evilly, a plan forming in his mind.

"So, Max," Harry gave his smile that made girls try to drag him to the nearest closet, "Would you like to take a tour?"

"Sure," Max stood on top of her bed and yelled, "Wake up everyone! Up and at 'em!"

Fang and Angel groaned, but finally, both of them were in a sitting position.

"Okay, everyone, we are imprisoned in a magic school called Hogwarts. It turns out that magic is probably existent. In addition, it turns out that Harry Potter is an actual person and is standing right there. He is willing to give us a tour of the school, and because we have nothing else to do right now, everyone, and I mean the entire Flock, is coming with us. Understood?"

"Aye, aye, captain!" Gazzy saluted Max and jumped off his bed. Fang silently slid out of his bed and joined Gazzy. Only Angel stayed asleep, hugging Celeste and sighing contently.

Fang grabbed Celeste from Angel's arms. The effect was immediate. Angel sat up, looked around, saw her bear in Fang's hands, jumped up, and attempted to pull it out of his grasp.

"Give…Celeste…back…!" Angel cried and tugged at the bear.

Fang sighed.

Max said, "When we leave this hospital place. I can't stand the smell of it. Besides, that Madam Pomfrey woman keeps on trying to inject something in me, and I don't exactly appreciate it, so I expect we should leave before she comes back."

While this conversation was going on, Madam Pomfrey was standing in the shadows of the hospital wing, glowering in their direction. She held up her syringe like a gun. An eerie snarl crept from the darkness, saying, hissing "Must…poison…girl."

Max, who was staring at Madam Pomfrey as well as the rest of the Flock, shuddered and agreed to leave immediately.

As soon as they left the hallway, Cho Chang, Padma and Patil Parvati, Lavender Brown, Pansy Parkinson, and Ginny Weasley started running toward them, squealing with delight.

Harry explained grandly, "Ah, you see, I'm very well-liked in this school, the girls can hardly resist me-,"

"Oh my goodness! What an adorable little girl!" All the girls were cuddling Angel, who was soaking up all the attention, "She's SO cute!!!"

Harry was rather disgruntled. _He_ was the adorable one, not some blonde six year old.

"Ladies, these are my acquaintances. You saw them fall into the Quidditch field earlier," Harry said, trying to draw the attention back to him.

"Speaking of which," Ginny looked suspiciously at Max, "How did you come in the school? Don't we have a lot of spells to protect people from coming in?"

Before Max could answer, Harry responded, "Oh, they found their way in. You know how strange Hogwarts is. Now, Max dear, why don't we move on with the tour?"

As they finally lost the swarm of girls, Harry asked, "Look, I'm not going to ask how you got through the barrier, but how did you get so high in the first place?"

The Flock looked at each other uneasily. Should they tell Harry about their wings?

"My friend Ron says you guys are angels or something," Harry laughed nervously, "I think he was just freaked out or something."

"Can we go to an empty classroom or something?" Nudge started, "I mean, with a school this big, you should have a million empty classrooms! I wish I could live here forever, learn magic, teach myself a love potion, give it to Edward/Cedric, and then he'll love me, and then-,"

"It would be nice if we'd get Nudge a muzzle," Iggy muttered, wondering why Ron was hugging his arm with both hands, whispering creepy things in Iggy's ears, things like, "One day, you and me will be alone…" and "You're making Snape look ugly!"

"Yeah, there's an empty classroom over here," Harry checked the room for any people/ghosts, and then walked inside with the Flock + Ron.

"This is how," Max, at the word "how", spread her specked wings, stretched them a little, and then flapped a bit too. The rest of the Flock revealed their wings too.

"I TOLD YOU THEY WERE ANGELS!!!!!" Ron jumped up and down with glee, "I was, like, so totally right!"

"No, we're not angels, except this one's named Angel," Nudge gestured to whom she was speaking of, "We are human-bird hybrids. Basically, we're 98% human with 2% bird genes. We also have special powers for some reason. For example, Angel can read minds, control minds and change facial shape. Gazzy can mimic voices and, well, _let it rip, to the extreme. _I can touch things and know things about them. Iggy, well, he can only see white. Fang, he fades into the background if he is still enough, which is a lot. Max can fly at super speeds. We all can breathe underwater, but Angel learned it first. We're usually living in caves, subway tunnels, and/or log cabins that we break into. The only one of us who knows their parents is Max, and her mom is pretty cool. We need 3,000 calories a day, and since we hardly make it into 1,000, can we have some lunch now?"

"Who did this?" Ron's eyes filled with tears by imagining Iggy hungry, orphaned, and dirty.

"Scientists."

"Oh, _those_ messed-up nutters," Suddenly, Ron proclaimed angrily, "I will find whoever did this to Iggy and make sure they all DIE!"

Harry saw a Hermione-like emotional breakdown coming on, so he knew he had to stop it immediately, "Now, Ron, calm down! There's nothing you can do about then. We can feed them and take care of them, now that they live here."

Ron sniffed, "Okay."

Harry, "Its lunchtime, so let's eat,"

The nine of them went to the lunchroom, smelling the delectable lunch that the house elves prepared for them. When they arrived, using a shield spell to stop from all the girls from pinching Angel's cheeks, the Flock was amazed at all the food.

Roasted chickens, pizzas, fettuccini, tortellini, roast beef, steak and bacon, fries, mashed potatoes, gravy, peas, carrots, sausages, pork chops, lamb chops, hamburgers, chicken nuggets, fritters, and hard boiled eggs, for some reason.

The Flock ate so much that the house elves had to make more food for them to get full, but in the end, they became full.

Fred and George were talking to Gazzy about their accomplishments.

"Oh, Fred, we've been such bad children, haven't we?" George commented with the air of someone mentioning how fair the weather seems that particular day.

"Yes, we've set off so many Dung bombs, so many fireworks, so many accidents, it's a wonder we are allowed in most public places,"

Gazzy, who was trying to find out what Dung bombs were, asked Fred, "Can you pass the sausage?"

George declared, "_Accio Sausage_!" and the sausage floated toward him. "Here you go, Fred/George Junior!"

Gazzy was amazed; he still couldn't get used to the fact that there was such thing as magic. "How does that spell work?" he asked.

Fred explained, "You say Accio and them what you want. It's really simple."

"Wow!"

"You know, George, I like him," Fred commented, "He looks innocent but he isn't. We were like that once, and look how successful we turned out! Maybe we could teach him a couple tricks that we have up our sleeves? So we can pass on the tradition of rule-breaking?"

"An excellent idea, Fred, we shall start with the lessons soon. Don't worry, Gazzy, we'll make sure you'll make the best pranks in no time!"

Meanwhile, Harry was flexing his muscles as the girls oohed and awed over them. Harry Potter really likes his attention. He was really trying to get Max to like him, but she wasn't caring. _Perhaps I should use a different method_, he thought.

Very suddenly, Gazzy jumped onto the table and yelled, loudly and clearly, "VOLDEMORT!!!"

The effect was immediate. Everyone panicked, running here and there, slamming into each other, screaming, yelling, and crying. The girls were hiding under the tables, and the boys were trying to reach their common rooms, but kept on slamming into other things like furniture, teachers, Hagrid, and Filch. The Great Hall was a mess of food, blood, people, and owls. Ron saw this as the perfect chance.

"Iggy, I want to show you something!" Ron shouted over the mayhem, "It's this way!"

Ron dragged Iggy out of the Great Hall and explained where they were going.

"You see," Ron started, "We're going to this place called the Room of Requirement. If you walk past it three times, thinking about what you want, then open the door, and then you get what you need. For example, if you need to hide a crazy schizophrenic girl named Hermione, there will be a kitchen, a medicine cabinet with her medications in it, a couple knives, a library, and tweezers. I know because I've done it on many occasions."

"So," Iggy was feeling rather daring at that particular moment, "If I wanted it to be alone with someone, it'll give me what I need?"

Ron was in seventh heaven right now, _He's flirting with me! He is _so_ flirting with me!_ He smiled to Iggy and said, "Here we are!"

Ron walked past the room three times, thinking what he needed in his head. I will not tell you what he was thinking, because then this fan fiction would be an Adults Only fan fiction, and I am not _that_ pervy.

When the door appeared, Ron and Iggy walked inside, wondering how the room would turn out.

It was a Honeymoon suite; pink walls decorated with purple and red hearts with a fluffy white bed in the middle with a card saying, "Have a grand stay!", a light dimmer, a stereo, CDs of romantic songs stacked on top of the stereo, romance movies, a 65 inch TV, candles, empty dressers, a hot tub, a loaded kitchen, different scented bubble bath perfumes, and rose petals everywhere.

Because telling you exactly what happened in there would psychologically scar most of you forever, I will eliminate it, and for those extremely, abysmally, distortedly perverted readers who want to know what happened at that part, please contact me at and I'll mail it to you.

Neither of them noticed Nudge sneak in with them, because they were too busy with, uh, whatever they were doing. Nudge hid behind a dresser, held up her video camera, pressed her record button, and snickered silently. It's show time.

As the commotion in the Great hall began to die down, Dumbledore began to lecture Gazzy in his office.

"Young children these days," he sighed, "They just don't scare like they used to. You see, in my school, there are goody two shoes and there are kids who prank themselves near to expulsion. I don't accept anyone in between, besides gays of course. How else did you think people like Ron, Snape, and I get into this school? So please either improve your prank strategy or become a nerd. I prefer the former, though. Did I make that clear?"

Gazzy nodded, "Yes, Professor, sir,"

"There's a good lad. Now, hold my wand for a second and let me find my Chocolate Frog card," Dumbledore handed his beloved wand to Gazzy and began looking in some files.

Gazzy knew better than to do it. He knew he shouldn't have, but it was just too tempting. He waved the wand and yelled, "_Accio boxers_!"

Dumbledore's butt began to fly in Gazzy's direction. "Merlin's beard," he muttered as he floated bottoms up near Gazzy, "You're a wizard!"

"Are you serious? That's so cool!"

"Now, will you let me down?"

"What am I supposed to say, or do, or whatever?"

"I'm not too sure myself."

"But you're the principal of a school of magic! How could you _not_ know?

"Gazzy, I'm not even completely sane. Do you expect me to remember something as insignificant as a counter curse?"

"Oh great."

After a good half hour, they finally discovered how to get Dumbledore down. "Now, we must get the rest of your family. Maybe you all are Muggle-borns or something."

"The only one of the Flock that's related to me is Angel, the littlest one," Gazzy explained, "The rest of us, uh, somehow met each other and decided that living together would be best."

"Excellent! We need the Sorting hat! Call the entire group!"

Somebody knocked on Dumbledore's door. A hook-nosed, black haired guy peered in. "Not cheating on me, are you?"

"Of course not, darling, why would I? I was just simply discovering this child's talent. This Muggle that fell through our roof isn't a Muggle at all! He's a true wizard!"

Snape wasn't interested in this discovery, however. "Well, when you are ready, meet me in my office, alone. I have some, uh, business with you."

Dumbledore giggled, "Of course!"

Snape left and closed the door.

"Now, please get the Flock for me, is that what you called them?"

"Yes, sir."

Gazzy walked out of the office, deciding how to find out where Max and they were. "Hey," he stopped a stout kid with a couple of plants in his hands, "Have you seen Harry Potter?"

Neville nodded and pointed to the right, "He's in the library."

Gazzy ran in the direction of Neville's finger.


End file.
